Social media is one of the best tools I have to get the word out about my writings. I am fairly active in the writing communities of several social media platforms. While it is a blessing, it can also be a curse. Look at any feed and one will see that while there are a great many supporters, there are also those who criticize. There are those who have it better than we do. There are those who just like to act like trolls no matter where they go.
And it isn’t just in social media that this happens. Anywhere people are gathered, comparisons are made. Words are said that remind us of past issues, sending us into spirals. We are underestimated, reminded of past mistakes, compared to others, the list goes on. We often feel we are unworthy, unloveable, and made to feel like we have to do better and be better to earn something.
We all have expectations thrust upon us from an array of arenas. There is someone who appears to have it all together. There is a tremendous amount of pressure upon us to be “perfect”. We need the perfect house, the perfect look, the perfect attitude, to raise our children in the perfect way, to treat our animals perfectly. We have to constantly prove ourself worthy. We take snapshots that look perfect, but then we realize that no matter what, there is always someone better than us out there and we fall short of the expectations made of us.
“So cool in line, and we try, try, try / But we try too hard and it’s a waste of my time /
~ Pยกnk “Perfect”
Done looking for the critics ’cause they’re everywhere / They don’t like my jeans, they don’t get my hair / Exchange ourselves and we do it all the time / Why do we do that, why do I do that?”
We end up feeling like we’re hearing the message loud and clear. You are not good enough. You never will be.
But it doesn’t have to be that way. Even in the roar of noise and the constant reminders, amidst the voices that scream at us that we are not enough, there are quiet whispers as well that tell us we are perfect just the way that we are. There’s magic that shows us this every day, if we take a moment to look. All of those noises, those angry voices… they are just others’ insecurities and baggage rearing their ugly collective heads. It’s someone else’s ideas.
“Wait a second/ Why should you care, what they think of you?/When you’re all alone, by yourself /Do you like you? Do you like you?”
~ Colbie Caillat “Try”
No one has it all together. Anyone who says they do is probably selling you some snake oil or something. But know this – it takes effort to do anything, even to get up and try again after something fails. Learn to embrace the insecurities, learn to move on from the mistakes of the past, learn that your life, while messy or even seemingly together, is perfect enough. It’s in learning to love the imperfect that we find perfection. It’s in knowing that no one is perfect that we find we are indeed good enough.
All will be all right. You are good enough. You are loved. You are worthy.
Stay magical.
Write your own story.
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Why do the negative voices drown this out? Why do they stick so much harder? Why are the bad things easier to believe? No matter how much I try to focus on the positives, when it comes to myself, this is still a lifelong struggle. I need to tape this to my mirror….” You are good enough. You are loved. You are worthy.” Thank you ๐๐๐
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I agree. It’s a life long struggle – I posted a comic panel over on the author page on FB that has something to do with the negative voices and teaching yourself to drown them out. It was something that I connected to.
And you are welcome! I write these for me as much as for anyone else. I need to be reminded frequently by myself of all of these affirmations.
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That comic is amazing….need to do more of kicking them voices to the curb! ๐๐๐ I many times share/write the messages I most need to hear as well ๐
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