Contentment

I recently walked the half mile home from the full time job on a beautiful late spring afternoon. The sun was shining in a sky littered with giant puffy clouds. There was a breeze that kept the walk comfortable. I had some music going via my phone and my wireless earbuds. I was looking forward to about an hour of writing outside, one of my favorite things in the world to do at present time. But at that moment, I had nothing on my mind except how glorious the afternoon was.

Picture contains the view of trees, a water bottle and a notebook with a portion of the writer's story.  The water bottle and notebook are in the shade, but there is sunshine.
My view while writing on my lunch break from work on Monday, 16 May 2022. Photo by K. S. Wood

It’s been close to five months since I started practicing this idea of making my own contentment, of trying to find the good in every day, the magic in every moment. Since Christmas of 2021, I have made it my goal to try to find something good in every day. I try to post that good for others to share as well. It was part of my conscious effort to find my own contentment and try to learn to live in the moment, rather than panic about things beyond my control. I have seen what worry can do to a body long term and I decided I didn’t want that for me.

That’s not to say that I am happy every single moment of every single day. I have my bad moments still. Since Christmas, I have even had some days I’d rather not relive. I have my meltdowns still, especially after a long, hard week. I still go through brief periods of doubt and self-loathing and even worry. But I try to look for the positives in things instead of focusing always on just the negatives. I am trying to find the eternal optimist from my youth again, instead of the cynicism I had gotten into the habit of doing.

It’s been a journey. It will always be a journey for me. But it’s one I will gladly take.

So when my walk home was full of nothing but contentment, I was elated. I embraced it as I enjoyed the warmth of the sun on my face and the happy tunes that played through my earbuds. But my heart was humbled, for I knew it had taken awhile to get to this point.

Being content with life is a marathon, not a sprint. It can’t happen overnight. I am still working on finding the magic every day. Each day it gets a bit easier to see, but it’s still part of my own story to actively look. And yes, sometimes it’s mentally and physically exhausting. But it’s worth it.

Life even with this kind of mentality isn’t always easy, but I try to take my own steps to mitigate the stresses that used to send me spiraling into full-fledged meltdowns and self-loathing loops. I am mindful of the things I can control and am working to ask myself why the things I cannot are such big deals in my headspace. And while I am not one hundred percent there, I feel better about myself now. I feel better about my writing. I feel better about the kind of life I have. Because I have chosen that this is the way I want to live my life.

I can’t take credit for this idea….. but this was something I created in December 2021 to help me when I had one of my moments of spiraling and self-loathing. It hangs over my desk, reminding me that I cannot control everything and that I need to focus on what I can control.

While this kind of mentality works for me for now, I am aware it can not and will not work for everyone. I know each person needs to find things that work for them, and each person needs to not be afraid to try something different if what used to work no longer does. If that means I have more bright days where I am soaking up the sun in a blissful state on a walk home from a hard day of work, then it’s worth it to me.

It’s the story I continue to write for myself. It’s the kind of story I want to write in my works.

Find your own happy.

Make your own magic.

Write your own story.


If you liked this blog post and wanted to see some of the fantasy works I have written, check out my Portals Series.

If you are interested in my other online endeavors, check out the drop down menu to see more.

And as always, #writeyourownstory

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