Are you sure?

It’s just three little words, but there is a great deal of hesitation in them. Certainly, we want certainty, but sometimes…. We just aren’t able to know for sure. We overthink. We question ourselves. We question others. We even question God.

We have identity crises. We make excuses for ourselves and our abilities. We aren’t strong enough. We aren’t brave enough. We aren’t good enough. We can’t do the hard things. We can’t put ourselves out there. Are you sure it’s me that can do this? Are you sure you want me to do this? Are you sure?

I know that I tried for years to hide this little weird magic of mine. I tried to keep it quiet. Writing was my escape, my way of expressing myself when I was trying to be what others wanted me to be. I wasn’t sure how others would take to the real me, this zany, march to the beat of her own drum person who has social anxiety and definitely can put words to paper better than she can speak them. But past criticisms and experiences had taught me that this form of expressing myself wasn’t good enough or special enough to be anything more than just a hobby. I made excuses when those who read what I did write would ask me why I didn’t show the world. I downplayed myself because all I saw was just words strung together, instead of the magic behind the words.

But then…. a friend read something I wrote long ago.

“This is good,” they had said. “You should try to write more. You are a fantastic writer.”

“Are you sure?” I replied.

“Yes.”

But still, I ignored it. Others chimed in, reading the pieces I did send out into the world. I was told I was good enough. I was told I was special enough. I was told my words mean something. With each compliment (which was hard to take since the aforementioned past experiences had taught me words were false), I became braver and bolder. With each “are you sure?” I became a bit more confident. This ability of mine just needed that chance to blossom and bloom…. and look where it got me. Seriously, look where it got me.

While I don’t think I am a great writer or the best at stringing words along, there are others who take this weird little magic of mine and love it, wrapping it up in their minds as something to hold on to. I have had perfect strangers stop me and tell me that something I wrote has made their day. And with each of these little encouragements, I let that little light shine brighter.

Even as we feel alone, even as we sit and question if what we are doing is truly the way to go, we all still march on. We walk this weird path of a story called life, finding the magic that makes it uniquely our own. We answer our calls to do the hard things even when we have all of these doubts and fears. On spite of ourselves, we each spread a little light and magic, peace and joy, hope and love along.

So magical friends, even when we are asking “Are you sure?” and don’t have anything figured out, we just gotta trust that the magic is there to find this chapter of the story. Even as you hesitate and don’t think you are good enough, smart enough, brave enough, special enough…. let that little light shine and shine bright.