Holy Week and Random Thoughts

I’ve been a bit unmotivated to sit at my computer and write this week.

Well, I should say I’m unmotivated to write when the weather is nice outside and the sun is shining through the office windows that are still grimy and in desperate need of cleaning.

But here I sit regardless, watching two of my three felines sunbathe as the morning sun shines brightly through those aforementioned gross eastward facing windows. There’s an empty birdfeeder taunting me from its hook outside and a limb from one of our many trees that lays in the backyard, knocked down by the brief storm last night.

I’m thankful it didn’t hit the garage.

This week is Holy Week. Usually I have some wonderful thoughts swimming through my head and insights to share about the wonders of this week, but this year I’m kind of apathetic towards it. And that’s okay too.

That unmotivated bit… I’d rather be outside, enjoying the sights and sounds that nature has to offer. I’d rather be hitting the trails of the conservation areas in the county I used to live in, seeking out geocaches as I watch the first fruits of spring percolate through the forest. Violets and rue-anemones are making their appearances, as are other spring wildflowers. I’d rather be raking the leaves that I’ve left for so long in the yard and prepping my garden for the first time ever. I’d rather just be listening to the wind that blows through the trees and the bullfrogs calling for their mates and the woodpeckers that knock on trees and even the starlings that steal all of the birdseed from the feeder taunting me thorough the window now.

Perhaps it’s because unlike the world around me, nature doesn’t let me down. There are glimmers there that others have stolen from me the past few months. There’s a stillness there that I used to find with friends I no longer have. There’s peace and hope, joy and love, light and magic there.

But then, when I think about it, I find those moments with others as well. The friends who have showered me with love when I want to just throw in the towel. The random person who right now is systematically reading all of my books on Kindle Unlimited. The text at one in the morning from a friend saying she stayed up way too late to read my last published book because she couldn’t put it down. The people who like my latest adventure on YouTube or laugh at the adventures I make my Squisheys go through on my Facebook posts. These moments, these little glimmers of magic help to stem the emotions. They quell the anger of betrayal from former friends. They silence the voice in my head that say I am not good enough, strong enough, smart enough to do the things I have already come to complete.

It’s Holy Week, that week that started long ago with everyone cheering in the capital city for a man who came riding in on a donkey and ended with that same man saying THE story isn’t finished. It’s a week where all of the feels were felt. It’s a week that all of us can sympathize with.

So stay magical, friends.

Know that the story isn’t done.

And keep on writing it.

Because even when I don’t want to sit down to type out the words, I keep writing my own story too.

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